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Getting in Shape: No More Excuses, Tubby!

by CWojtkowski


Fit­ness and grad­u­ate stud­ies shouldn’t be incom­pat­i­ble. Yet a glance at the stu­dent body reveals that Grad­u­ate Cen­ter stu­dents are over­whelm­ingly out of shape. Long hours of slog­ging through books, end­less meet­ings and rig­or­ous course loads leave lit­tle time to exer­cise — or so you think. I am writ­ing to chal­lenge com­mon ideas about work­ing out in hopes that Grad­u­ate Cen­ter stu­dents will leap to adopt health­ier atti­tudes toward exer­cise. The excuses my friends and col­leagues give for not exer­cis­ing are astound­ing in their absur­dity. Most of them wouldn’t spew the same non­sense when it comes to school­work, but when it comes to their car­dio­vas­cu­lar health, they proudly claim to be “too busy” to move faster than a shuf­fle or lift any­thing heav­ier than a fork. Here are some of the most com­mon sorry excuses:

The Excuses

I don’t work out because …

  • I don’t have the time.” The most preva­lent excuse is really a cover-up for lazi­ness and lack of moti­va­tion. World lead­ers have much busier lives than you, yet they still man­age to sched­ule an occa­sional sweat ses­sion. Remem­ber Pres­i­dent Clinton’s famous jogs? (Okay — to McDonald’s — but it was still aer­o­bic exer­cise). None of us is so busy that we can­not find a pal­try twenty min­utes here and there to jump some rope, do some crunches, or run up and down stairs. When you moti­vate your­self to do some­thing, you will find you actu­ally have time to do it.
  • I live in New York City. I get enough exer­cise by just walk­ing.” This excuse is fool­ish for sev­eral rea­sons, but it is likely influ­enced by the pop­u­lar words of fit­ness “wis­dom” seen in mag­a­zines, claim­ing that mun­dane activ­i­ties like laugh­ing, wash­ing dishes, or clip­ping one’s toe­nails burn just as many calo­ries as work­ing out (sure — if you’re gig­gling for an hour and a half straight). The same goes for hoof­ing it, these stud­ies insist. Yet it is false to think that one’s daily amount of walk­ing — to and from the sub­way, to class and back — can be con­sid­ered exer­cise. If you break a sweat by merely walk­ing from GC to the 34th street sta­tion, then you and your car­di­ol­o­gist have my con­do­lences because you prob­a­bly don’t have much longer to live. Remem­ber, you are a like a gazelle: you were born to run. Tak­ing a few extra steps here and there is always a good thing, but will not tone you up enough.
  • I’m a veg­e­tar­ian / nat­u­rally thin.” Thin­ness is no auto­matic indi­ca­tor of phys­i­cal fit­ness, and while plant-based diets are ben­e­fi­cial to the body in many ways, you can still be an out of shape slug even though you’d never eat a plate of escargot.
  • I have bad knees/a bad back/X hurts when I work out.” Of course, some peo­ple do have seri­ous injuries, or have inher­ited prob­lem body parts. But many stu­dents use this excuse as if it’s a bum body part that keeps them on the couch in front of the TV instead of out­side play­ing ten­nis with you. Unless you spend most of your life in a catcher’s mask stop­ping fast­balls, you do not have bad knees. Rather, every­thing hurts because your mus­cles and ten­dons have been lying dor­mant. If you go slowly, after a few ses­sions of light work­outs, you should find that your so-called prob­lem mid­dle toes were never any real hin­drance to a lit­tle exercise.
  • I get enough exer­cise by chas­ing after my 2 year old.” I am hes­i­tant to crit­i­cize the work­out habits of new par­ents because I am not one myself. Their waist­lines are the least of their wor­ries. Check­ing their kid’s rec­tal tem­per­a­ture and ran­sack­ing the house to find a mis­placed stuffed ani­mal is exhaust­ing day in and day out. But while par­ent­ing is tir­ing, it should not be con­fused with aer­o­bic exer­cise. Like­wise, I can think of no worse exam­ple to set for one’s own chil­dren than that essen­tial house arrest (i.e., sit­ting sta­tion­ary all day) is a way to live. While you might be unhealth­ily out of shape, don’t let your kids be. Besides, work­ing out will give you more energy to go hunt for that way­ward stuffed aardvark.
  • I don’t lift weights. I don’t want to get too bulky.” Women often say this, quite igno­rant of how the body works. Fear not: adding ten pound weights to your rou­tine will hardly morph you into a square-headed, burnt-to-a-crisp bleach blonde with Popeye-esque fore­arms. Those women work out as their full-time job, or are juiced up. Recre­ational weight train­ing will tone your mus­cles, not add bulk, unless you train heav­ily for that pur­pose. All healthy women should add weights to their fit­ness rou­tines for strong mus­cles and strong bones. Pop­ping cal­cium pills in hopes of staving off the big “O” (osteo­poro­sis) is silly if your mus­cles are flabby and saggy.

The Solu­tions

Do any of these excuses sound famil­iar? Here are some tips for ways to max­i­mize your fit­ness regime while mired in the rig­ors of doc­toral study. (Remem­ber, con­sult your physi­cian or go to the Well­ness Cen­ter before you start any work­out program.)

1. Join the Baruch gym. Few grad­u­ate stu­dents can afford the steep monthly rates charged by most New York City gyms, not to men­tion their ball-and-chain three-year com­mit­ments. In con­trast, Baruch College’s fit­ness cen­ter costs a mere $100 per year. It is just a few sub­way stops from the GC, and unlike some gyms I’ve belonged to, the envi­ron­ment is really relaxed — no intim­i­dat­ing mus­cle­heads or bikini mod­els milling about — just stu­dents look­ing to get in shape.

2. “Run” your errands. For eight years now I have lit­er­ally run my errands, a time-saving way to squeeze in some aer­o­bic exer­cise. I put on the appro­pri­ate work­out gear and a tight-fitting back­pack that doesn’t bounce around. Then I run around my neigh­bor­hood, hit­ting the bank, drop­ping off my dry clean­ing, and return­ing videos. I save my gro­cery shop­ping for last, doing bicep curls with the result­ing plas­tic bags. This is a great way to effi­ciently burn calo­ries. (Of course, you could “bike” your errands too, but add a cou­ple extra miles.)

3. Make effi­cient use of down­time. We grad stu­dents can’t always frolic around out­side. So buy an exer­cise ball and do crunches while you screen movies for your film class. Jump rope in place while you lis­ten to your recorded inter­views for your lin­guis­tics project. Do lunges across the biol­ogy lab while you wait for your fruit flies to mate. Stuck at the com­puter? Take ten-minute breaks every hour and do a set of tri­ceps kick­backs in between.

4. Involve your friend/lover/spouse/child in your fit­ness rou­tine. Tell every­one that you’re turn­ing over a new leaf, so you’ll feel like a chump if you give up. Instead of meet­ing your col­leagues for beers, get together in a park and jog or walk briskly together. Strap your kid in a runner’s stroller and do laps. Chal­lenge your room­mate to a weight loss duel — who­ever loses has to clean the toi­let for a month.

As a life­long exer­cise lover, I under­stand that the first step is the hard­est. But you can either stop the silly excuses and get mov­ing, or put your­self at fur­ther risk for phys­i­cal woes later on in life. You spend so much time and resources work­ing out your brain, why not do the same for your body?

And besides, do you really want to look like a pro­fes­sor when you even­tu­ally become one?

Posted by CWojtkowski on Jan 15th, 2006 and filed under Features. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response by filling following comment form or trackback to this entry from your site

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